That is, knitting which is simple and straightforward, and requires no thinking or working out the pattern while it's being done.
First are these simple mitts -
Handspun Shetland yarn, helical stripes, easy thumb shaping; they're a bit big for me, but a gorilla might like them.
Then there's that good old stand-by for simple knitting - a scarf -
Handspun merino/silk in Old Shale pattern, sometimes called Feather and Fan (I don't know if there's a difference). It worked out eventually about 6 inches wide and 57 inches long, but isn't as soft as I would have expected. Perhaps it's the garter rows.
The mitts weigh 42 gms and the scarf 100 gms - so not even a small dent in the stash.
And there wasn't much TV involved either, as few of the the programmes recently have appealed.